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She also found that many women in relationships with bisexual men said they had better emotional and sexual intimacy and stronger gender relations than they did with heterosexual men. ‘A common element among all the women in healthy and happy relationships was open communication with their partners as they designed, negotiated and maintained the ground rules and boundaries of their relationships,’ Dr Pallotta-Chiarolli explains. Redefining what’s normal on the sexuality spectrum ‘Many Australian women say they feel overwhelmingly isolated, invisible, misrepresented and deliberately ignored, sometimes by their own male partners, often by families, friends, health services and more broadly in Australian media, popular culture and research,’ Dr Pallotta-Chiarolli says.Īccording to Dr Pallotta-Chiarolli, women in unconventional sexual relationships experienced discrimination from heterosexual and homosexual communities. Through their research, they found that many of their interviewees experienced challenges. They identified as heterosexual, bisexual and lesbian, while some didn’t label themselves. All of the women had been in monogamous, open and polyamorous relationships with bisexual men. The research included interviews with 78 culturally and sexually diverse Australian women aged between 19 and 65. Dr Maria Pallotta-Chiarolli, from Deakin’s School of Health and Social Development recently worked with Sara Lubowitz from the Sydney-based Women With Bi Partners Network to study mixed-orientation relationships or MOREs, as she refers to them. Sexuality: covering a broad spectrumĪs sexual diversity becomes increasingly accepted in Australian society, those in non-traditional relationships highlight the fact that there is a complex sexuality spectrum that’s not limited to straight or gay. She also says she’s demisexual, which means she’s only attracted to a person if she has an emotional bond. She identifies as ‘pansexual’, which means she’s attracted to all genders. Those with a fixed idea of what relationship should look like might find such a scenario confronting, but 28-year-old Susannah says her poly relationship, in which she is married to a man and simultaneously dating her boyfriend and girlfriend, is far more natural than being in a monogamous heterosexual relationship ever was for her. ‘My favourite photo from the day is of the four of us together, me in the middle with a big dumb grin on my face surrounded by the three people I love the most in the world,’ she says. Meanwhile, her girlfriend stood by her side as the maid-of-honour.
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But instead of following the age-old tradition of the father walking her down the aisle, Susannah, a member of a loving polyamorous relationship, asked her boyfriend to do it.
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When Susannah Bailey married her husband, her wedding day was as full of joy as any other.